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Why I Am Not an Evanjellicle & Why I Offer Heartfelt Condolences To All Those Who Are

  10/21/16 , by Dissidens, Categories: Evangelical culture

 

 

This is Derek.

Derek is trying to look not-awkward.

Personally, I don’t think Derek looks awkward at all, I think he looks like the typical hostage making a video while hooked up to electrodes. I was a little surprised he didn’t tell us he was being treated well by his captors.

(There is a valuable lesson here for those of even extremely modest intelligence: just because you have a camera and a blog does not mean you are qualified to make serious comment.)

Anyway, Derek is trying his hand at incomplete thoughts on something something Evanjellicle something church.

Watch and learn.



4 comments

Comment from: Unk [Visitor]

What a poser. Makes me appreciate Bultmannians more since at least they care about authenticity.

10/21/16 @ 21:07
Comment from: Dissidens [Member]  

One has to love everything about this masterpiece.

I love the way he starts out with “So…”.

I love the way he uses his hands: as any college-educated NFL professional concussion victim will tell you, hand-dancing is what makes one credible as an insightful commentator, even if the hand motions appear erratic, incoherent, even spastic.

I love the way he suggests a sociological component, or slice, and then repeats some banal fact which does not remotely touch on the issue. Many people throughout history have been similarly mobile; they remained committed to the Church—if not a local or temporary expression. The problem with young Evanjellicles is not that they are uncommitted to one local congregation for a lifetime, they are uncommitted even to an indefinite sequence of fashionable emotional states.

“…we stay in school longer…we get married later…we have kids later than that…”

What piffle.

And ambient disbelief in God makes Christians more uncommitted?!

What undiluted piffle.

Mobility is not the issue here, sociology offers no insight here.

Look at what happened to religious life in Russia, China, (and now perhaps the Muslim world); social or cultural ambivalence explains nothing at all.

I could go on about what is ludicrous about this religious crackpot, but that’s prolly something everyone should explore for himself.

Where have all the credible posers gone?

10/21/16 @ 21:54
Comment from: semajm [Visitor]

So…they don’t commit because they are special little snowflakes raised to think that the world should bend to them and if it doesn’t they should either protest it into doing so or move along to the next distraction. Wait, is that what he said?

And with the hands! I got dizzy and had to look away, which was a mistake, because then I saw a squirrel that was infinitely more interesting than this clown.

10/30/16 @ 14:55
Comment from: Dissidens [Member]  

Yes, squirrels do have a gravitas about them that Derek lacks.

Squirrels are so lucky they don’t have to be Evanjellicle.

10/31/16 @ 11:42

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